Finding opportunity, the American dream

By: Sarah Atsu

CUMMING, Ga.-- The American experience is highly individualized, yet some themes, like hard work, connect many stories. 

Fleeing the iron grip

After World War II, Peter Belansky and his small family—his wife, Elena, and their daughter, Danica, who goes by Donna—found themselves fleeing from the Soviet government. Belansky had discovered that the regime was trying to use him as a pawn to globalize its communist rule. 

After being approached by members of the Czechoslovak Secret Service, Belansky was offered a job in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia.

In his autobiographical manuscript, Belansky wrote, “They told me that once a month I would be going to the Czechoslovak Embassy to receive the monthly pay, but at the same time I would have to bring with me a list of the local people I had met during the month and who told me that they were not happy with their government and they wish the government would be overthrown, and replaced with a new form of government. That request made me start to think about what exactly they wanted me to do. I began to see the assignment in a different light. I realized I was being asked to help the communists from Moscow to establish a similar form of government, a bolshevik dictatorship, in another country! I was crushed.”

When Belansky realized the true nature of his assignment, he knew he couldn’t cooperate. What he was being asked to do went against everything he believed in. But he knew if he recanted his acceptance, the possibilities of him and his family being imprisoned, or worse, were high. He had no choice but to run. He and his family gathered a few belongings and began their journey. First, they made their way to Great Britain, where they stayed with some friends of Elena’s. 

“We thought we were finally safe and nothing bad could happen to us,” Belansky wrote. “We had no idea what was coming for us.”

Although Belansky said no one ever mentioned the true nature of their trip, their friends seemed to understand the real reason they were there. One day at breakfast, they had a rude awakening when a newspaper alerted them to the fact that they were not safe just yet.  

“One morning, my wife’s friend placed a copy of The London Times newspaper on the table,” Belansky wrote. “There, on the front page with big letters was this headline: ‘The Czech couple was put on a plane to Prague after asking for political asylum.’ It was a huge shock for us. Much later in the USA we learned that the Labor Party, which was in power in Great Britain at the time, was the closest to the communist party. Prime Minister Harold Wilson had approached the communist government in Prague in Czechoslovakia and asked whether they would potentially open their market for some English products to be sold in their country. They replied that it would be possible but in turn, Great Britain had to agree to return any Czech citizen asking for political asylum… We figured that for us, the only possibility of survival was to get to the USA.”

In 1965, Belansky and his family arrived in the U.S. The family had nothing to their name, save for three suitcases and a dream of freedom.

Looking for a better life

95-year-old Ramsey Dilibero was not yet conceived when his Italian grandfather decided to move to the U.S., looking for better opportunities for his family and generations to come. However, at the time, the U.S. had quota limits on the number of immigrants allowed into the country from other nations. The Italian quota was full.

“My Grandfather wanted to come here in 1899,” Dilibero said. “However, the quota was full so he went to Sao Paulo, Brazil and he took his son and his oldest daughter, leaving his wife and his other two daughters in Italy. They were there for six months when he heard that his wife had passed away, so he packed up and moved back to Italy.”

Upon returning, Dilibero’s grandfather continued working and saving, waiting for the chance to move his family to the U.S. Finally, in 1909, with the quota open again, he had enough to move himself, his oldest daughter, and his son, Dilibero’s father, to the U.S. The family settled in Massachusetts, where they continued to work to bring the children who had been left in Italy to the U.S. as well.

Embracing heritage

After her family’s escape from the restrictive, communist government in Czechoslovakia, Donna Eberhardt’s family began a new life in the United States. Because Eberhardt was so young when her family first arrived, all she knew as she grew up was the American lifestyle.

“When I was growing up, I didn’t understand all this stuff,” Eberhardt said. “I didn’t know what communism was, I didn’t understand my parents' need for us to get out of there. I was raised being able to do whatever I wanted to do, just like any other kid. The difference was, that my parents wanted to keep the traditions from our home country, Slovakia, alive to me and for me to understand that heritage, which was great. Looking back, it was absolutely the right thing to do, it just made me different from my peers.”

One of the ways in which Eberhardt differed from her fellow students was the food that she would eat, and the meals her mother would pack for her lunch.

“When I would go to school, I would bring a lunch to school that was really different from the lunch that some of my classmates would bring,” Eberhardt said. “In Slovakia, there were still issues with health and hygiene, so your milk was always boiled before you could drink it. My mother would boil my milk and pour it into my thermos for lunch. As it cooled, the milk would form a skin over the top, and when I opened my thermos I had to peel that off before I could drink my milk. I was kind of teased and made fun of for these differences.”

Despite the attempts to make her feel bad for the apparent differences in her lifestyle, Eberhardt didn’t let it bother her. Instead, she invited others to take part in her culture along with her and used it to spur her determination to be successful.

“I felt good about being different, so it kind of almost worked to my advantage,” Eberhardt said. “Because I took pride in my family and the way we did things, people became interested. My friends wanted to come to my house and experience the food we ate and the life we lived. The bullying almost built me up, you know? Do you want me to show you some differences? I’ll show you how good my life can be, and how well I am going to do!”

A common thread: hard work

Eberhardt’s family and their experiences instilled in her the importance of three things—faith, family and hard work. These three values shaped her worldview and were important enough to Eberhardt to pass down to her own children.

Despite the bullying she faced at times, Eberhardt felt comfortable with who she was and considered her home and family her safe space. She credits this to her parents.

“I came here with my mom and dad, that was it,” Eberhardt said. “And guess what? I grew up not feeling alone, not feeling the loss of all the family we left behind because my parents filled in those gaps with family. Always family dinners, family discussions, family activities on the weekends. My parents invested in me; their time, their energy, their emotions. And the importance of that was, I never felt alone.”

The idea of working hard for what you want is one that Eberhardt strongly believes in, as it was hard work and resilience that fueled her parents to come to the United States, earn their citizenship, and make a life for themselves.

“My family had to go through a very stringent vetting process in order to become citizens of this country, and I believe that vetting process was the right thing,” Eberhardt said. “Even at that time, and even though it was very hard for my parents.”

To Eberhardt, it is frustrating that the same process is not in place now for individuals and families coming to the United States. Her opinion on the subject comes from her own experience with immigration.

Unlike Eberhardt’s parents, who still embraced their culture while living in the U.S., Dilibero’s mother and father pushed their children to assimilate into American culture as best they could.

“My parents would not speak Italian in the house, they only spoke English,” Dilibero said. “They wanted their children to adopt everything about the American lifestyle.”

Despite that, food and being surrounded by other Italians in their living spaces and communities helped keep parts of the culture alive in Dilibero. He vividly remembers past trips to the beach in big groups of multiple Italian families and sharing traditional Italian meals.

Like Eberhardt, hard work was a massive part of Dilibero’s life and success, a trait reflected in his father’s dogged work ethic and determination.

After graduating high school, Dilibero did not have enough money to go to college, so he worked to save enough money for a semester, then enrolled at Oklahoma State University. After his first semester at Oklahoma State, Dilibero then found himself with only $7 to his name, a leftover of $60 that his sister, a nurse in Boston, had sent to help him. To finish his education, Dilibero joined the Air Force when the Korean War began.

“After I finished my first semester at Oklahoma, then the Korean War started,” Dilibero said. “The GI Bill offered soldiers free education, so I took advantage of that and got my degree. The GI Bill paid for college, but not for room or board, so I also became a firefighter to pay for my room and board. Firefighters were given lunch, so I at least had one solid meal every day.”

The Servicemen’s Readjustment Act of 1944 (GI Bill) was a law that provided a number of benefits to servicemen returning from WWII. With its help, Dilibero graduated with a degree in industrial engineering and went on to join the waste management business where he was wildly successful. He, working with a company called BFI, set up landfills globally in Saudi Arabia, Venezuela, Caracas, and Marikaibo. Eventually, some gentlemen from Wall Street came and bought the company.

A shared appreciation for the American Dream

Despite coming from different backgrounds and having varying experiences in America, both Eberhardt and Dilibero agree on one thing: that America has given them opportunities they likely would not have had almost anywhere else, regardless of the amount of effort they put in. 

“I have an extremely strong allegiance to America,” Eberhardt said. “I love my heritage and my country and I’ve shared that with my kids and family, but America is the jam! It allowed me to truly be fully myself.”

“The American dream means everything to me,” Dilibero said. “Where else on earth could I have accomplished all that I have but here? So, it means everything.”